The holiday season is often painted as a time for joy, family gatherings, and traditions. But for many, it can be a season of solitude, reflection, and emotional challenges. A 2021 survey by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) revealed that three in five people in the U.S. experience a negative impact on their mental health during the holidays. For those spending this season alone, whether due to loss, life changes, or being single, it’s essential to find ways to make the holidays meaningful and uplifting.
Licensed therapist Ana’Neicia Williams, DSW, LCSW, founder of Momology Maternal Wellness Club, highlights three themes that often surface during the holidays: grief, boundaries, and traditions. “Whether you’re grappling with loss, adjusting to an empty nest, or feeling the pressure of idealized holiday imagery, it’s important to address these emotions and find ways to navigate the season positively,” she explains.
1. Navigating Empty Nest Syndrome
For parents whose children have moved out, the holidays can bring mixed emotions. Quincy Black, a Chicago-based lifestyle blogger, knows this feeling well. After her son left home, she faced guilt and shame, realizing she had unintentionally placed expectations on him.
“I spent last year’s holidays with my niece while barely speaking to my son,” Quincy shares. “But through therapy and open communication, I’ve started to rebuild our relationship. Now, I’m focusing on self-care and exploring new hobbies to make this season fulfilling.”
Williams advises empty nesters to acknowledge their feelings and use the opportunity to create new traditions. Inviting children home while respecting their autonomy can help maintain connections. Exploring personal interests, like Quincy’s self-care routines, can also bring joy and lead to new holiday traditions.
2. Dealing with the Pressure of Being Single
For singles, the holidays often amplify societal and familial expectations. Briannon Kelley, a Los Angeles-based PR professional, finds herself fielding questions about her relationship status during family gatherings.
“I’m the youngest of five, and all my siblings are married. The holidays stir up emotions about what could be,” she says. “While I’ve achieved so much in other areas of my life, love feels like the missing piece.”
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Williams encourages singles to reflect on whether their desire for a relationship stems from personal goals or societal pressures. For those seeking companionship, leaning on friends and participating in activities like Friendsgiving or holiday decorating parties can ease feelings of isolation.
“It’s okay to prioritize your well-being and focus on building meaningful connections,” Williams adds.
3. Coping with Loss During the Holidays
For those mourning the loss of loved ones, the holidays can be particularly challenging. Venise Blow, a Chicago resident who lost both parents, understands this all too well.
“The grief comes in waves, especially as the holidays approach,” Venise shares. “I’ve learned to connect with extended family and embrace new traditions to keep their memory alive.”
Williams advises that acknowledging grief and finding ways to honor lost loved ones, such as creating a memory tree or sharing stories, can help navigate this emotional time. Seeking support from friends, family, or professional counseling is also crucial for coping with the void left by loss.
4. Creating Your Own Holiday Joy
No matter the circumstances, it’s important to take control of your holiday experience. Whether that means trying new hobbies, reaching out to friends, or creating traditions that reflect your current stage in life, the goal is to prioritize your happiness and mental health.
As Williams puts it, “The holidays don’t have to be perfect or meet anyone’s expectations but your own. Embrace what brings you peace and joy.”
The holiday season can be a time of healing, self-discovery, and even joy—if you allow yourself the grace to redefine what it means for you.
